lol thinking.

hmmm, thinking.. lol.
i dont really need this haha.
its kinna funny, i want it, so i can feel that sense of responsibility, and happyness and all..
its also bad kuz i gotta have that confidence to be happy without it and have that responsibility without it either.
aha xD what is love? xP
do i really want/need it right now?
haha. atm? i want it.. i wanna be wit sum1. not in a dessperate kind of way. buh in lyk, in terms of aktualli having sum1 to say i love them haha.
just like God as he olwais says that to us :)

rage

ahaha ! FUCK. lol.
hate secrets. i swear. lol :L never like the idea of people keeping things from me o.o lol :L doesnt feel lyk im trusted D: haha.

updatesupdatesupdates

hmm..updates on me.
lately? ive been sad :( soo saaad, that no even sees it. soo depressing, and im sick! that must be lyk the most awsomest combo ever. naht. things just feel soo f*ckd up ae.
lyk the whole worlds down on me. ><

problems.
stressing..uni.. dancing.. singing.. hmmm. soo many things to doo. buh dance is pretty much my service for God, which i promised to do at the start of this year.. so i must keep my promise as olwais. singing.. i wanna continue.. but not with the choir atm.. too much for masses ! but once again its alll on service. so its worth it. lol. gaah, guess i cant really help it ae haha. Ill still try to do my best i guess :(.

haha now..repuation.
my closest friend, soo well known. girls praise him!! hes alot better than me at things.. and here i am.. under his shadow o.o
buh it all comes to my head.. do i really need all this? do i need the fame? the reputation? the girls he gets? haha :L
the answer to that is F*cK NaWh!! aha xD :)
i wanna be undercover again. sick and tired of everyone knowing me and of who i am.
hatin on the word 'skux' lol.

terms of love life?
haha hmm..lets see..i dont feel lyk being in anything.. all i want is a chill relo. no fights, no dramas. we just enjoyin life together! haha das all i ever want. xP.
jus hope, i find her pretty soon. lol. i may have found her..but i dunno yet. we;ll see.

so yeah das all about me. more will come soon.
take care dudes.. God bless.

hmm..

ok, so turns out, the person i liked before.. on my last post
yeah, was just a crush after all haha :L xD silly ae buh yeah, thats me wenever i find sum1 intresting haha.

buh man.. you know wat i really miss??

i miss that feeling...of loving sum1 and them loving you back...
i miss taking turns of saying good morning.. aha xD :(.. hate waiting.

i hate the fact that some girls.. can really make you wait..and then ditch you like everythings ok.. and wen that does happen, you think back through the times..
even back to the times where you had other things with the girls u liked as well..
saying.. asking yourself.. "wat did i do wrong..?"

haha xD no one wants to be lonely.. specially me. i could never live alone in this world.. haha xD its lucky Gods there. but yeah

i just really miss the feeling of love. :(

gnyt guys. God bless aha xD

ohfuck.!

AHAHA XD
fuckn first time clubbing last nyt, oh em gee
it was awsome
i came home all tired, tryna get some sleep
but fuck ! im head overheels with this girl.
i mean i knew her before buh we didnt get to talk to each other that much
buh just knowing her now, omgosh.. i love her personality !
gaaah. shes cute and pretty too !! ahaha xD
man,i dunno if i can get her ae, i wish i can
i dunno if she likes younger guys though buh yeah who cares
buh faaah ! aha xD i think, she could,
well myt be
the one i can picture myself with HAHA :L
i olwais do that with girls i like, buh hey, i dont think its wrong?

haha buh wats gay is that fuck.. shes mu with another guy! again ?!
i dunno if i should head into this kina thing again
buh we shall see. lol.
well thats it for now dudes. aha xD
take care ! and God bless aha xD

p.s update shall be soon aha xD

cometothinkofit.

hey, sup. *sigh*

im here typing this, simply kuz, I don;t know who to share it with. I thought I;d share this to God but then I might as well write this first to see how things go through.

You know, there comes a time where you wanna feel like you wanna be loved by people. You want to be liked by other people, like as in to have people having crushes on you and stuff.

At a moment in my life, I wanted to feel like this. I think kuz its simply out of jelousy i think? I;m not sure yet, buh i think it is at the moment.

You know how gay it is to hear people talk about their special someone these days? or dudes talking about some pretty girl that likes them back and stuff. Its gay when you;re just sitting there when they suddenly ask you, "what about you bro? Whats going on in your love life?" and all you can say is "nothing bro." fuck.

I would have to say that being single can be a blessing since you have the freedom and stuff.

But for me.. I;m the kind of person who NEEDS a special someone. Not because of having to feel of being loved by another, but because, it simply makes me feel whole. It gives me responsibilty, happyness.. a whole lot of things. Don;t get me wrong though, its not that im using that special someone to make me feel like that. Well im not really using my special someone, its kuz i need that special someone and if you dont know yet, needing something is alot more different than wanting something.

All I want I guess is for that special someone..my dream girl..to just come. Kuz atm, im tired. Im tired of tryna find her. Im tired of hurting. I dont want to sit still kuz its boring.

Right now, im in a position where i know some people who like me. lyk crushes and stuff.

I do hope that they dont tell me yet, kuz i dont wanna tell them that i aint ready yet, or simply say that i dont like them back. Kuz man, i dont like hurting people.

Come to think of it, wishing to be liked by other people is GAY.

One would be enough.

And right now, im hoping that the One person would be the one.

haha kina hoping that, that one person is this girl i talk to every now and then.

Kuz yeah.. i dunno. theres just sumthing about her i guess.

Buh hey, we;ll see yeah?

Im not ready yet, buh ill see how things go through kuz yeah, may never know that I might regret sumthing that i should have done. so yeah.

Thanks for the ear blog. You;re a great listener.

Take care, and God Bless haha :D